WH&E L1 6 : 0 London Royals W1

The ladies 1s hate late games…they mess with our heads…but apparently, they turn out to be pretty good games for us though.

We started strongly with a billion shots on goal but their keeper kept everything out.

Shell bottled a shot at the top of D; Amber did the same. Sam, Bethany and others all decided to aim for the corners of the football goal instead of the hockey goal.

But then we decided to actually score: A lovely penalty corner calmly put away, and then another soon after by Gemma! A third was scored when Amber forgot what to do and Bethany had to score for her.

3-0 HT.

In the 2nd half we sat back and kept dominating, but seemed to forget to shoot. Then a penalty stroke, and after a mini domestic between Sam and Shell on who was taking it, but it was calmly put away to make it 4-0.

Soon it was 5-0, when a great link up saw a “rugby huns” goal from open play.

And then 6-0, with the slowest goal ever from Karen Goode after some pinball bouncing of the ball around the goal.

Six goals (again), a clean sheet and a fine all round performance!

WH&E M1 3 : 4 Southgate M5

Southgate really know how to put on a show, and with news of WH&E coming to town, they decided to dedicate “Super Saturday” to trying to break the record home crowd attendance in England. They accidently had the stands facing the wrong pitch though.

Anyway, we got off to a fast start which saw Dan hit a ball into the D, which was swiftly deflected in by Colin for a 1-0 opening. This usually doesn’t happen to us, but we’d had an inspired team talk from the captain!

We were rather dominant for some time, however Southgate managed to get themselves a penalty corner, which then turned into a flurry of corners and it finally paid off as they managed to scramble a ball into the back of the net.

Soon after this, another penalty corner found the back of the net for Southgate, with a deflection over the Winchmore keeper. “Why always me?!” cried Josh!

Just before half-time, Dan wanted to be the man of the show and passed the ball into chairman Dom who decided deflecting at a 5 degree angle was a good idea… it was and it popped its way through a gap between the keeper and the post. 2-2!

In the final moment of the first half, Dan latched onto an Ollie aerial and found himself 1v1 with the keeper…only for the umpire to blow for half-time ☹.

The half-time team talk was very inspired – Dan had two assists to his name in one of his best performances for WH&E EVER, yet Jack was picking up a spare man so had all of the captain’s plaudits at half-time. [Ed – who wrote this 😂]

Into the second half, we finally managed to get a penalty corner of our own about 5/10 minutes in. Up stepped Joe T with the drag flick and the legend sent the ball into top bins for an outstanding goal – the best of the day to put us back in the lead at 3-2 up. After this, no idea when but Southgate found their hat-trick from short corners to make it 3-3, much to the dismay of Dan Steer who tried to big up his peers by allegedly saying “come on lads, we ain’t Everton”.

Ahh it wasn’t to be though, as Southgate managed to get a winner in the dying minutes of the game, from yet another penalty corner – 4-3 a seemingly harsh scoreline.

WH&E L2 0 : 2 West Hampstead W4

Us (9th, 3 wins incl. a walkover) v Them (top of the league, 1 loss, won 19-0 the week before)

“We won 2-0 but bloody hell did they make us work for it.”

WH&E M2 2 : 4 Indian Gymkhana M5

A tough game for the M2s against top of the league Indian Gym. But Winchmore made the visitors battle hard for their win, picking up two well taken goals from Harry and Theo.

WH&E L1 1 : 1 London Royals W1

The weather seems to be a running theme in these match reports….this week it was unseasonably warm #climatechange.

Coming off the back of our 11-0 victory last week, the L1s arrived later than normal at Southbury (Sam didn’t get the memo and had to be told after running round the house like a nutter getting ready at 8.30)

Our word of the day was capitalise….but we forgot quite early on. An early short corner saved off the line by a Royals defender denied us the lead. A quick break from the Royals and some messy defending gave them the lead. A very back and forth game ensued as we fought for an equaliser. Not even the incredible #rugbyhuns short corner routine was working but never fear after passing the ball so kindly to the opposition again adding to her DOTD nominations Sam was able to get a clean strike from the top on a short corner pulling us level and making captain Shell very relieved. Some more breaks from the Royals left us very very nervous but MOTM Nic kept her cool and denied the oppo beautifully.

A much more normal result for us. A cheeky win would have been nice but a fair result of a draw.

Next week the only north London Derby that matters…

WH&E M1 1 : 2 Southgate M5

Hi, Matt here. Just wanted to pause near the season midpoint and praise my colleagues for their efforts so far.

Josh has returned in goal this season with real pep. And it only took a one-match ban to bring out his best.

Jake is my player of the season so far. The team agrees, having rewarded him with at least two Richard of the Day awards (so far).

When Asher has the ball, time slows down. At least for him. The opposition are usually operating at normal speed.

Dom is a treasure. And he was absolutely plundered by Southgate for one of their goals.

Dan’s PE teacher energy is inspiring. I’m just thankful he doesn’t make me do push ups for each time the ball hits my foot.

Ollie? New chap? I don’t recall such a weak-whiskered guy in the team. Unrelated: donate to WH&EHC this Movember: https://uk.movember.com/team/2436447

Harry often seems to be playing another sport. Sometimes he smashes the ball into the goal, like in tennis. Sometimes he tries keep our score down, like in golf.

Jack and me have experienced the mean streets of Ponders End (#EN34EVA), for which we share an eternal bond that transcends the sport of hockey.

Colin travels 4,000 km a season from Berkshire to play with us actual sheer berks in Enfield. Does this also make him a berk? Multiple player of the season awards would disagree with me.

Joe is the more handsome and talented of the Turmaine brothers and he definitely didn’t threaten me to type this.

Luke scored with one of his signature ‘Luke-ins’ from a static position and the excitement ignited his pugilistic rage (watch out Josh).

Jim (welcome back) looks great in purple and doesn’t look at all like an aubergine. Unlike some of the other Full Kit Williams in the team (you know who you are).

Literally nothing bad to say about Tom. Keep it up, pal.

Anyway, we lost 2-1 or something to Southgate M5s, idk. Something, something, we don’t let this slip, we go again.

WH&E L2 0 : 6 West Hampstead W4

The L2s turned up to a nice, surprisingly warm, sunny day. A rag tag bunch going up against the undefeated top of the league. Were we going to do it? A successful David against their Goliath? (Spoiler alert: no.)

We fought hard, with great pressure and passing moments – including going round the back to our surprise! Lisa helped (?) with the David and Goliath metaphor by hitting the ball into her own head.

With the word of the day being ‘honesty’, the opposition walked away with 6 goals to our feeble none.

David just had an off day. He’ll definitely beat Goliath next week.

WH&E M2 2 : 6 Indian Gymkhana M5

An away trip to Indian Gym, not the result we wanted, or the lack of match report either! Hopefully better on both fronts next week…🤞